We will always disagree with and question someone’s thoughts and actions when they don’t align perfectly with ours. That seems perfectly natural, expected, and understood. What is difficult to understand is how some people will not change their mind even after receiving compelling information or evidence that is contrary to their original thoughts.
Anchoring Bias shows that we rely on the first information that we receive disproportionately.
Confirmation Bias shows that we tend to look for conformation more than contradiction.
Availability Bias shows that we lean towards the most available evidence first.
Prospect Theory Shows that often value outcomes irrationally.
No one enjoys being wrong and we tend to avoid change. We seek out companionship with like-minded people. So, sticking to our opinions and with our tribe feels comfortable and right.
So how do we change someone’s mind? We don’t. It's tough to remember that we cannot change other people. We can only change ourselves. You will be more successful trying to get someone to open their mind and maybe nudge them into a new direction.
Just like it's almost impossible to stop a rolling boulder, it's easier to run alongside someone and bump them in the direction of a different path.
So, open your mind and listen in as we discuss some tactics in the Art of Persuasion.
How to gently nudge
B – Benefits must be clear so that there is a win/win
A – Ask questions and argue logically and emotionally
C – Confidence and credibility
O – Open their minds by opening your mind
N – Nudge, don’t force.
My beliefs would not let me budge,
For the opposition, I was holding a grudge,
But then, over time,
I opened my mind,
And changed my thoughts as they gave me a nudge.
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