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Subtle Signs of Disengagement: A Leader's Holiday Guide

  • Writer: Marty Jalove Master Happiness
    Marty Jalove Master Happiness
  • 2 days ago
  • 6 min read

Have you ever been gift shopping in December? You have a list, a budget, and a mission. But after the third crowded store, the second parking lot battle, and the first time you hear that holiday song for the tenth time, something shifts. You start making compromises. “Does Uncle Jerry really need another sweater? A gift card is fine.” You start avoiding the busiest aisles. You spend an hour wandering, looking busy, but your shopping cart remains empty.

That feeling of avoidance, of going through the motions without making real progress? That is the essence of disengagement in the workplace. It's not as loud as a resignation, but it’s just as damaging.


While our last discussion focused on "Quiet Quitting," (read it here) today we’re exploring its sneaky cousins: the subtle, almost invisible signs that your team is beginning to drift. These are the quiet whispers of discontent that appear long before the silent roar of a two-weeks notice. Let’s unwrap these behaviors and discover how to reignite the holiday spirit in your team.

Animated man in an office dodges flying colorful balls, holding a briefcase. His wide-eyed expression conveys panic. Desks and monitors visible.
Quiet Dodging: The Art of Avoidance

Quiet Dodging: The Art of Avoidance

Think about that big family gathering. There’s always one relative you’d rather not get stuck in a long conversation with. You see them across the room, and you immediately find a sudden, urgent need to go check on the mashed potatoes. You aren't being rude, exactly. You're just... dodging.


Quiet Dodging is the workplace equivalent. It’s when employees subtly sidestep responsibility, accountability, and challenging assignments. It’s not a flat-out "no." It's a "maybe later," a "let me check my calendar," or a complete disappearing act when a tough project is being discussed.


Signs of Quiet Dodging:

  • The Meeting Mirage: They are physically present in meetings, but mentally they have left the building. When asked for their opinion, they defer to others or offer vague agreement.

  • Ownership Aversion: When a new initiative is launched, they become masters of camouflage. They avoid making eye contact and stay silent, hoping the responsibility lands on someone else.

  • The Path of Least Resistance: They consistently volunteer for easy, low-impact tasks while avoiding projects that require stretch, growth, or a high degree of accountability.


This isn’t about laziness. It's often a symptom of fear, fear of failure, fear of being overwhelmed, or fear of not being supported. As a leader, your job isn't to corner them. It's to create a path where they feel safe to step forward.


How to Re-Engage a Quiet Dodger Your strategy here is C.A.R.E.

  • Clarify Expectations: Are the goals of the project clear? Sometimes avoidance comes from confusion, not unwillingness. Break down large tasks into smaller, manageable steps.

  • Acknowledge Effort, Not Just Outcomes: Create a culture where trying and failing is better than not trying at all. Praise the courage it takes to tackle a difficult task, regardless of the final result.

  • Reinforce Support: Ask them directly: “What do you need from me to feel confident taking this on?” This shifts the dynamic from accusation to collaboration.

  • Empower with Choice: Instead of assigning a daunting project, offer a choice between two challenging tasks. This small sense of control can make a world of difference.

Animated woman in blue suit looks stressed, holding phone and papers under spotlights. Cardboard desk, chalkboard, and drawers in background.
Productivity Theater: The Illusion of Busyness

Productivity Theater: The Illusion of Busyness

We all know the feeling of a looming deadline. The house needs to be cleaned for guests, but instead of tackling the biggest messes, we find ourselves organizing the spice rack. It looks productive. It feels productive. But the main task remains undone.


Productivity Theater is when employees put on a show of being incredibly busy, but their actual output is minimal. They are masters of performative work, creating the appearance of effort without delivering substantial results. This is often driven by insecurity, a fear of being seen as slacking, or being genuinely overwhelmed and not knowing where to start.


Signs of Productivity Theater:

  • The Update Overload: They send constant, detailed updates about minor progress. Their emails are long, their status reports are intricate, but the needle on the project barely moves.

  • The Meeting Marathon: Their calendar is packed with meetings. They are always "in a meeting," but these discussions rarely lead to decisions or actions.

  • The Documentation Deep Dive: They spend more time creating presentations about the work, documenting the process, and building spreadsheets than doing the actual work itself.


This behavior is a cry for help. It says, "I'm trying, I swear! Please don't think I'm failing."

How to End the Performance: Your goal is to focus on results, not activity...


Try the R.O.I. approach.

  • Results-Oriented Objectives: Shift conversations from "What are you working on?" to "What progress have you made toward the goal?" Define what a "win" looks like for each project.

  • Open the Door: Create a safe space for honesty. Say, "I know the workload is heavy right now. I'm more interested in impact than hours. If you're feeling stuck, let's talk about it. My door is open."

  • Impact Reviews: During check-ins, focus on the impact of their work. Ask questions like, "How did that task move us closer to our goal?" This helps them self-correct and focus on what truly matters.

Animated office workers with duct-taped mouths sit at desks stacked with papers. The mood is dull and oppressive in the blue-toned office.
Communication Drop-Off: The Sound of Silence

Communication Drop-Off: The Sound of Silence

Think about the anticipation before the holidays. In early December, the office buzzes with talk of plans, parties, and excitement. But as the year grinds to a close, that energy can wane. The chatter dies down. The team gets quieter.


A Communication Drop-Off is one of the most reliable indicators of dipping morale. When people are engaged and happy, they talk. They collaborate. They laugh. When they are disengaged, they retreat into silence. A quiet team at the end of the year is rarely a content team.


Signs of a Communication Drop-Off:

  • The Email Evaporation: Responses get shorter. Emails become curt. The friendly sign-offs disappear.

  • The Virtual Void: In virtual meetings, cameras are off, mics are muted, and the chat is a ghost town. It feels like you’re talking to a wall of avatars.

  • The Energy Vacuum: The natural buzz of the office disappears. There’s less casual conversation, fewer shared jokes, and an overall dip in the collective energy.


This silence is a warning siren. It signals that connection has been lost, and your team is operating in silos.

How to Break the Silence:You must be the one to restart the conversation...


Be the S.P.A.R.K.

  • Schedule Non-Work Talk: Put 15-minute "coffee chats" on the calendar with no agenda other than to connect as human beings. Ask about their life, their weekend, their hobbies.

  • Praise Publicly and Personally: Recognition is a powerful communication tool. Acknowledge good work in a team meeting (publicly) and follow up with a personal thank you (personally).

  • Ask Powerful Questions: Instead of "How are you?" ask "What's one thing that made you smile this week?" or "What's one challenge you're proud of overcoming?" These questions invite real answers.

  • Role-Model Vulnerability: Share a small, appropriate challenge you're facing. When the leader shows they are human, it gives the team permission to be human, too.

  • Kickstart a Fun Ritual: Start a weekly tradition, like sharing a favorite song, a funny meme, or a weekend highlight. It’s a small, consistent way to rebuild rapport.

Subtle Signs of Disengagement: A Leader's Holiday Guide

The Final Gift: Presence Over Presents

As a leader, the greatest gift you can give your team during the hectic holiday season is your presence. Be present enough to notice the subtle shifts. Be present enough to care. Be present enough to act.


Don't wait for the exit interview to find out what went wrong. The clues are right in front of you; in the dodged responsibilities, the performative busyness, and the deafening silence.

Listen to the whispers now, so you don’t have to deal with the fallout later. By addressing these subtle signs of disengagement, you can turn a team that’s drifting apart into a team that’s ready to conquer the New Year, together.


Marty Jalove, Master Happiness, smiling and touching his chin. Wearing a shirt with yellow "What's Your Bacon?" logos and a smartwatch, posing playfully.
Let's Master Happiness together.

About Marty Jalove

Marty Jalove is the driving force behind Master Happiness, known for his infectious optimism, decades of business coaching experience, and a knack for igniting passion in teams and individuals alike. As a sought-after motivational speaker, team-building expert, and creator of the "What's Your BACON?" framework, Marty's blend of humor, heartfelt insight, and actionable strategies have helped countless organizations find focus, foster gratitude, and turn potential into real progress. His workshops and coaching sessions do more than inspire, they equip businesses to build resilient, happy, and connected teams. Ready to take your business from surviving to thriving? Reach out to Marty at MasterHappiness.com and discover the power of happiness-driven success.


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